What Happen To Dreams?

                             ÁWá photograph via Wikimedia.org

What happened to all the dreams as a child, the simple ones to develop a career, providing for myself?

What happened to the days of planning in a journal what I will do by age 25, 30 and so on?

What happened to all the fruits that should fall from hard work?

What happened to 2015 turning into my year?

The answers: NOTHING.

NOTHING good comes out of people like me, the people who be even mad at my struggle. Can you imagine people being jealous of a struggling, suffering person? Is that what the world has turned.

Then you have the ex boyfriend who messed up but will not leave you alone and his girlfriend who is adamant that you are the one who is after him. Someone needs a reality check.

This is not a piece for encouragement or inspiration. It is a frustrated words that need venting.

 

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Broken Shanty

Source: hjtann.blogspot.com

As I sit under the dilapidated shanty, humming Love Lifted Me, I feel my broken spirit subtly lifted.

The gentlemen ask “do you go to church,” I said yes but I have not been for sometime because of work.

Now I am seeking comfort in the spirit that you implanted within me, Jesus.

I am sure you are asking “where have you been all along my child?”

I have been there all along my King, life just created that hedge between our love.

Letting wild tangled weeds creep slowly between our well manicured lawn.

Looking up at the holes of that shanty, so apt to mirror the vacancy in my heart.

Another day has done and I am once again under the beat up shanty.

Cuddling my body as best as I could against the frosty waves beckoning my heart.

It still bites, it is still raw, it is still vivid.

Too soon for coziness that does not measure the vast bleak despair.

Smiles should not be expected, if you get a few, then congratulations.

Torn between feelings of love and anger.

Confusion!

You should have protected me but you open the way to my hurting.