First the sly comments when I hold a baby or when I attend a wedding. Some family members would say “You are next,” I laughed, smile in reply or I gave a courteous reply. Then suddenly the remarks became crude such as:
“You are approaching 30 soon, you should not wait till your bones change to marry.”
“You need to have babies now, before you get OLD”
Folks my smiled disappeared and my the want to Stone Cold Stunner a few, came often to mind. Did I miss a memo stating that when you hit 30 it is now or never and the few years leading to that age, one needs to find in earnest a husband to make babies? Why is it that some people just cannot mind their wedding fever and leave my baby free and husband free life alone! Speaking of wedding fever I realized that a number of people who are eager for me to run to the altar are not really concern about me making babies with a man who I love. They are more interested in receiving an invitation so they can drink, eat merry and inspect my dress. They do not say it out loud but I read between the words that comes out of their big mouths.
Now if you are close to 30 and you are seeking a husband and babies, I am in no way throwing darts at you. I too would like to marry some day and make babies but I just do not want to do so now. Hence why I am so infuriated with the ever-increasing Rush Me To the Altar Squad. When I say I do, I want to say it forever, I do not want that lovey dovey feeling that wears out after the honeymoon period ends. Matter of fact I want the honeymoon forever! I want to look at my man every morning thinking “damn, he is mine” not “another 20 years with that old brute?”
If you fit the group of the Rush Me To the Altar Squad, could you please withdraw your membership. You are harassing that poor girl (whether she be your sister, cousin, auntie) to such depths, shame on you. I am sure you are the one who encouraged her, to save money to build/buy a home, to further her education and to travel the world as much as she can because you knew that doing it with babies and a commitment would be a different experience.
To the girl reading this who is on the receiving end of rude remarks about her age and babies, please be encouraged to lift your head a bit higher that Mount Everest has to climb up to see your eyes. (ok, that sound……) Do not let family, friends or the church (oh the church, the church) pressure you into marrying a man you know you have no intentions of doing that forever thing with. You search your heart and you know the buzz he gives you does not tremble you;like you love him but you do not want his babies. Girl, do not give him your forever!
So for now, I will be sleeping through my nights till morning with no dragging up from bed to do a diaper change. Yes, I am that selfish now, I have no desire for to lose my sleep. I can up and leave without checking in on anyone. I can make decisions with no result of offending the hussie. Yes, I have much growing up to do and who say I have to do it before 30?
By the way, why is 30 labelled as old?